Missing The Lone Star State – Life Overseas

There are a lot of things you do on autopilot that are just tiny threads in the normal fabric of your life. Grabbing a quick burrito for lunch, buying a pair of shoes, popping into Kroger for a gallon of milk. These are the things that make up life on a normal day. When you move overseas, these things may not happen any more and suddenly you realize you don’t have “normal” anymore and that what was your normal life is maybe unravelling a bit. You crave what used to be normal to you, and when you’re a Texan, that’s probably not going to be found on the French Riviera.

I’m not from Texas, but since moving to the South of France last year, I’ve made friends with several women from Dallas. They’re not socialites or rich. They’re average, middle-class, educated women. They were moved here as part of a temporary, multi-year relocation package with a big Texas company that shall remain unnamed. The names of these women have been changed to protect their identity because if their French neighbors ever found out that they miss Stuffed Meat Tators from Sonny Bryans or the ice from Sonic, they might just go revolutionary on their asses and torch their homes. OK, not really. The French would never do that; instead they would let their dogs poo on the sidewalk in front of my friend’s houses. Alright, they already do that, but anyway it won’t be good whatever they do, I’m sure.

So as my friends aren’t allowed to work here due to immigration rules, they’ve had plenty of time to think about what they really miss from Texas. Now make no mistake about it, these ladies have done a darned good job trying to integrate as much as possible here. They’ve taken French classes, joined social groups, taken art classes, done volunteer work and in general, sought to expose themselves to the language and the culture. But when you leave home, you are occasionally startled by your strong urges for things to which you never before gave an extra thought. Personally, I still occasionally think, “Hmm, I’d love some tacos for lunch today, I’ll just pop out and pick some up from…” and then realize there IS no place from which to get tacos and there is certainly no place to which I can “pop out.” At the beach I see a lot of popping out, but the French don’t normally do “popping out” for lunch. I know it’s a cliché, but they do love their leisurely, delicious lunches.

So what do my friends miss about Texas? Well, what makes them stare off into the Mediterranean all misty-eyed is the food. The migas at Café Brazil in Lakewood. Margaritas and queso at Mi Cocina while watching the ice skaters at the Galleria. Bob Armstrong Dip at Mattito’s (which isn’t on the regular menu by the way). Barbeque from anywhere in Texas. Iced tea. Frappuccinos. 44-ounce Diet Cokes from Sonic.

“What? Diet Coke,” you say? “Surely the French, with their svelte figures, have Diet Coke in France?” Well, they do and they don’t. First, it’s called Coke Light. Second, it’s almost never from a fountain. And third, it never, ever comes with more than a few small cubes of ice, which is normally all fine and good. But occasionally, you just miss what, even after two years here, is apparently ingrained as normal. Don’t tell me you don’t love getting a big fountain Coke on a hot day and taking that first pull through the straw. Maybe you get a few bits of ice with that sip and they graze your tongue for just a second before they go down. You get that slight tingle in the back of your head. That divine sensation is elusive here. One of my friends misses the ice more than the drink. The little ice pellets from Sonic never struck her as anything special when she lived in Dallas. In fact, she never thought about the ice pellets. But now, she breathes out two lungfuls of sigh before she says, “It’s the first drink I’m having when I go back to visit.”

This may not qualify as food per se, but all of my friends have said they miss hot, artificial-buttered, movie theatre popcorn. And, I’ll just squeeze this into the same category: the theatres in which you buy that popcorn. Big movie theatres, with 18 movies to choose from, the air-conditioning set to 62 degrees, stadium seating and tympanum-blowing sound systems are way up on the list too.

The second-most missed thing about Texas? Texans. My friends miss the pride they share with other Texans about being from Texas. You all sincerely believe you come from the best state in the best country in the world and just exude that happiness and confidence. As my friend Ann says, “This world needs more happy and confident people!” When someone here asks where she is from, my friend Sophia will always say she’s from Texas. She never says, “the United States” first. It’s always, “Texas.” Of course, things aren’t always as rosy as we remember them.

And it isn’t just that camaraderie or pride they think back on fondly. They miss the friendliness. Just about anybody in Texas will stop and chat with you and sometimes it may just be to tell you to go ahead of them in the checkout line because you only have a few things whereas they have a bunch.

The Texas Bluebell is also up there on the list of missed things. We live very near Provence, which is famous for it’s lavender fields. Yes, they are beautiful; and yes, they smell heavenly. But to both Sophia and Ann, nothing’s more uplifting than a field of Bluebells with their slightly curved petals, swaying softly on a Spring day.

Being as it as that my friends are from Dallas though, nearly by default they love to shop. They miss REI, The Container Store and Neiman Marcus. And in what other place would you have Bibbentuckers Dry Cleaners? At Bibbentuckers, they bring your cleaning outside to you. They have treats for your dog. They offer you lemonade while you wait. Though my friends have said they miss this store or that store from Texas, what I think they really miss is convenience. As much as we like the fact that mom and pop stores are the norm here and almost every store specializes in something specific, sometimes you just miss being able to get whatever you need whenever you need it, all in one place.

And just to let you know that my Texan friends aren’t just a bunch of eating and shopping machines, they do miss the sports. They miss going to Cowboys games, Rangers games, Stars games, Mavericks games and the possibility of going to the FC Dallas games. And they don’t just miss watching sports. They miss mountain biking at Rowlett Creek Preserve and rollerblading at White Rock Lake.

I know you may be thinking that perhaps my friends are a bit spoiled and maybe don’t appreciate this amazing opportunity to take in the French Riviera. Au contraire! They like it here. Often they even love it here. But from what they tell me, home is always home and when you leave for a few years you begin to realize that even though you now understand, “Bonjour” and “Buongiorno,” all you really want to hear is, “Hey y’all.”

And if you are considering moving to France or have already done so and wish to learn to speak French, this is an excellent software product.